dear Bridget: pile it up

Dear Bridget,

It’s that time of year. The time when people think about what they’re thankful for and celebrate holidays with family. It forces us to look at the good. Although really, how long does that last?

Here’s the thing: we always have a choice. Not just during this season, but all year long.

I could look at all the bad stuff that’s happened in my life. I could pile piece upon piece until I have a mountain of “why did that happen” and “it’s not fair” and stories that would make people feel sorry for me. When you pile up all of those, it starts to look like a pretty impressive mountain of bad, and it’s easy to think the good can’t outweigh it.

But it’s not a scale. You can’t measure out each bad event and look for a good one to counterbalance it. Life doesn’t work like that. You have to make a choice, a deliberate choice, to step away from the dark, towering mountain of bad and make for yourself a mountain of good. Not for comparison to the bad. Not to see if it’s enough. But because you can. To show yourself all the beautiful parts of your life.

Pile up the happy moments and the incredible opportunities and the hard-but-well-learned lessons. Stack up the comforts you have and the people who love you (not literally, though, because human pyramids are so 1990s).

It’ll be a choice you have to make throughout your life, Bridget. To create a mountain of good. The mountain of bad makes itself, unfortunately. The mountain of good takes a bit more effort. But it’s worth it. Not to trick yourself into ignoring bad things, but to reframe your perspective.

Now, the season of cheer and thankfulness, is the perfect time to start that mountain of good so you’ll have a foundation when January hits and February feels lonely.

Pile up the good, Bridget. Stack it high and celebrate the beauty in your life. There’s more there than you think.



What’s Dear Bridget all about? It’s a series on my blog composed of letters to a hypothetical teen girl named Bridget. Why Bridget? It means strong. And it represents the current generation of young women. These letters are my attempt to break through the chaos and the crap that’s flying at today’s young woman in order to offer advice and encouragement, from me and other incredible women who remember what it was like to be in her shoes.

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