I love words. Big ones, little ones, complex ones, simple ones. I’ve been enamored with them since I first learned the alphabet. It was as if I had unlocked a magical world I didn’t even know existed.
But sometimes words fail me. Sometimes I find myself staring at my resumé with no clue how to express myself. I think if I just focus long enough, my MacBook and I will achieve some kind of mind-meld and those words I couldn’t quite grasp will materialize on the screen. (It hasn’t happened yet, but I’ll keep you posted.)
“This is where the middle of your calf should be,” the doctor said, drawing a line on the x-ray.
The line he drew did not run down the middle of my calf. It ran along the side of my calf. My kneecaps, it turns out, are not quite where they should be.
Why are my knee caps elsewhere, you ask? No one really knows for sure. My best guess is a fall I took when I was about 3—a three-foot fall onto concrete. But whatever the cause of my misplaced kneecaps, I started having knee pain when I was a freshman in high school, prompting my visit to the orthopedic surgeon. (more…)
Every neighborhood has bullies. Ya know, those kids who lurk around the corners, skulking in the shadows. They’re usually bigger than you, and they have a posse of big, mean-looking kids. My neighborhood was no exception.
I hadn’t had a lot of run-ins with the bullies, but I’d heard about them. From my brother and other kids. I knew they existed.
One afternoon, my friend and I were riding our bikes around the neighborhood, looping around the streets that were within our parent-determined boundaries. We turned down one street and saw a group of kids on their bikes lined up across the street. (more…)
It was a new era for me. I was starting college. I would finally be able to make my own decisions and live my own life. I was thrilled. When I got my welcome packet, it contained a pile of information, including my college email address on a little, laminated card. “Go ahead and log in now,” the accompanying paper said. “Familiarize yourself with our system.”
So I waited a few weeks.
Ha! If you believe that, you probably don’t know me. Of course I logged in right away. Or tried to. (more…)
To many men, women are a complete mystery. We baffle them with behaviors that appear illogical and statements that mean more than they seem. I’ll have been married for six years next week. I still confound my husband sometimes. I know most of you know how to treat women with respect. But there are some smaller details that most guys struggle with. So gents, today I’m gonna give you a few pointers. Specifically, what not to say to your wives/girlfriends/female friends:
“You look fine.” If we wanted to look “fine,” we’d have stayed in our pajamas. Fine is what we dig out of our closets on laundry day. Fine is when we get the wrong coffee order but we don’t have time to make it right. Fine means “well, if that’s the best you can do.” Fine means “I’ll just deal with it.”