feel

Last week was In.Sane. One of those physically exhausting, emotionally trying weeks that kept beating up on me in so many ways. And I kept telling myself to compartmentalize, to deal with things and then move on, the sooner the better. Because that’s rational and smart and appropriate.

And then I realized that was stupid.

Ok, I didn’t realize it right away. I had an epiphany in the drive-thru of Starbucks. (BeforeĀ my coffee was in the car. How impressive is that?) All it took was a single line in a song on Pandora: “Take that rage, put it on the page, take the page to stage, blow the roof off the place.”

It gave me chills. The message smacked me in the face. Don’t hide it, use it. See, I don’t want to just be any writer, I want to be a great one. And what do all the great artists across history have in common?

They felt.

Deeply, wholeheartedly. The good, the bad, the excruciatingly painful. From anguish to joy, they didn’t simply deal with life and move on — they felt it, let the emotions wrap around them and channeled them into their art.

I’m not saying I want to dwell on negativity, go all emo on you and wear black from head to toe. But I can take my emotions and let them fuel me. Let them flow through my characters so the reader can feel them, let them drive me to be better, to do more.

Whether it’s happiness or anger, contentment or fear, my emotions are valid tools. They don’t deserve to be locked away. They should be acknowledged and used.

Note to self: put it on the page. And then blow the world away.