That time when… I made Lizzie Borden look sane

Everyone loves embarrassing stories. Why? Because it reminds us we’re not alone in our dorky awkwardness, in our “did that really just happen” moments.

No, my friends, you are not alone. I’m starting a new category of stories here, called “That Time When…” It’s going to feature all the accidentally funny and nutty things I’ve done. Because if you can’t laugh at yourself, you have no right laughing at all.

I can laugh at myself.

And I do.

Sometimes out loud.

On one particular day several months ago, I was coordinating a two-day training session at my work. This involved being there at 7:30 in the morning, putting up signs, greeting participants to give them their materials, coordinating the breakfast and lunch catering, and generally making sure everyone had what they needed at all times.

It’s a lot to manage, especially when you factor in the general lack of sleep.

After lunch on the first day, I was heading down the stairs to the training room to check on things. After I carefully descended the stairs in 4-inch heels, I paused at the bottom to find one of the class participants sitting on a bench.

And looking at me with an amused expression. Then I realized…

I had been mumbling to myself.

In situations like these, I find it’s best to go ahead and address the elephant in the room. I used to avoid it and pretend I was normal.

I’m so over that.

“You just saw me talking to myself, didn’t you?”

He laughed.

“Let’s just pretend you didn’t see that, okay? Okay.”

And I swiftly exited stage right. Without tripping or doing any other embarrassing things. Which I’m sure impressed him greatly and more than made up for my crazed mutterings.

All in a day’s work, ladies and gents. Welcome to my life.